2.06.2007

Annual Review for My Job

About a month ago, I hosted an activity that touched on organization and there was an open discussion on organizing our homes. I asked my next-door neighbor if she would start us out. She spoke on how she had worked in retail for ten years and it really opened her eyes on how people treated possessions. She is one of the most organized people I know. She has really got her head on straight. She mentioned that she doesn't have a lot of junk, so she doesn't have a lot of maintenance.

I loved hearing this! I love how she takes her job as a homemaker so seriously. I have been thinking a lot about this night. I remember hearing once upon a time that there are five instances that happen in your life that shape who you are. I hope this was one of those times. I haven't been able to get her advice out of my head.

I have been taking a long, hard look at my job. Am I doing the best I can? If I were being paid would I be stuck where I am or would I be receiving raises and accolades?

Are my co-workers satisfied with the job that I have been doing?
The answer to all of these has been no. Things in my household haven't been running as smooth as they could have been. I am not paying attention to the important details of raising my children or pampering my husband. Something in my heart broke when I realized this. They deserve the best of me.

Starting at the first of this month, I made a new resolution. I am going to be the mother and the wife that my family deserves.

On a message board that I frequent, one of the ladies came up with the idea of 14 days of Valentines for her husband. I have been doing this. I cannot believe the difference that it has made in our relationship. J has been so thoughtful and loving. Last night he came in with flowers for me. The thing that surprise me is that it started with me.

Another friend sent me an e-mail and it had this attached.

Believe in Your Husband's Heart
Dionna Sanchez

How can you make your husband feel like a king and treat you like a Queen in return? Believe in him!

Do you know that the average man has never had anyone believe in him? They feel a great deal of pressure to be a success, take care of their family, be involved in their children’s lives, etc. Just like us – they can feel overwhelmed at times and are very afraid to let us down; or fail.

Lift up your husband. Encourage him especially when he is feeling “low” or having a weak moment. Pray for him and believe in the possibilities. Your husband will feel your belief and that will impact him in a powerful way.

Sometimes we expect our husbands to have it all together as the head of our households. But it can be lonely at the top especially when you don’t have all the answers; and no one does.

So be your husband’s strongest fan and cheerleader. Let him know that you believe in his heart and what is inside his soul. He really needs to know that; and to hear those sentiments coming from you.

When we feel special we tend to bloom and grow. The same is true for your husband. Watch what happens when you convey your belief in him…and prepare to be inspired.



My Job as a Mother:

There are too many days when all I want to do is crawl into my bed and away from the cries of my girls. I want to avoid the bickering and the whining. I need to stop that. There is just not enough positive reinforcement and kind words. I need to work on that. I forgot that my kids are pleasersand helpers. I need to involve them more. Today M stayed home from school with a fever. While she was home, I was sweeping and mopping. She came up to me and asked me for a rag so she could help. I got out rags for both girls and we turned on the music and wiped down baseboards and wiped walls while singing and giggling. I need more moments like that.

One summer when I was a little girl, my mom made up a schedule for our family. Each day had something new and fun on it. My girls and I are going to make up a fun schedule like that to follow this summer. We have talked about it and we are going to devise our plan for Family Home Evening in a couple of weeks. I want them to have memories like mine.


My Job as a Homemaker:

I haven't done as well as I would have liked in this area. My biggest problem is putting things away. To solve that I am going to take my lovely neighbors suggestion and get rid of all of the excess junk. I don't need it. Someone else could benefit from our donations. Yesterday, M and I went through all of her toys and can I say I am absolutely impressed with her. She put almost 2/3rds of her toys into the donation box! She said, "I don't really play with these anymore. I don't need them."
Underneath is clean. I love to disinfect and scrub. In order to do that, the clutter needs to be gone. There are too many days when dinner is ready and we are working on cleaning off the kitchen island so we can eat. That has to stop. I love the motto of "A place for everything, and everything in its place." I am working on adopting this as my motto.


My Duty to Myself:

I need to take more time to take care of me as well. I love to craft. I have lost that somehow in the last couple of years. It just disappeared one day. Starting with my craft day with my sisters I have rediscovered my love of crafts. I look forward to creating things, to making something to give away or to decorate my home. I love to read...and I have been lousy at that. I love to curl up with a good book and a cup of hot cocoa. Last night after my girls were in bed, I made some cocoa and started to re-read Harry Potter. I need to get through all of them before the next book comes out.


There is nothing like taking a good long look at yourself and taking inventory of what needs to stay and what needs to go. It sure makes me feel light on the inside

30 comments:

Michelle said...

What a fantastic post, and such a great idea, taking stock of what's important in your life! I've recently started doing the de-cluttering thing as well. I tried to do one room at a time, but kind of fell off the mark after the first few attempts, but after this post I'm going to start again! Good luck with all your new goals!

Tori :) said...

Great post Stephanie! Thank you!!!
Do tell about the 14 days of Valentines, although it's now 8 days...

Code Yellow Mom said...

This kind of introspection is just the kind of thing we all need. great thought, and great goals! I'm going to go back to my little drawing board and set a few of my own...

Dawn said...

Beautiful!

Heidi said...

Wonderful reminder! I've started simplifiying things areound here too but there's way more to go!

The Mathews Four said...

Stephanie thanks so much for that wonderful post! You just wrote all of the things I have been feeling lately but haven't been able to untangle and put into words. I'm feeling inspired. Thanks for that!

Lei said...

There's gotta be something in the air - or network, lol - I've been going through the same introspective porcess. And you know what? I am the happiest I've bene in a long time.

Mel said...

Stephanie thanks for sharing this! I could use an annual review as well!

Dawnyel said...

You are so motivated....I just don't feel that right now...it could be that it's my bedtime, and I should be sleeping...
I love re-evaluating where I am, and where I want to be! Good luck on your goals!! I hope to be just like you someday! :)

Lisa said...

Loved this.

It was fun to visit here today!


I'll be back...

Char said...

Great post!

Rachelle said...

Beautiful post. I've been doing much of the same and seeing areas where I can improve. I'm loving the 14 days of Valentines too. It's really helping even my perspective.

itybtyfrog said...

What a great inspiring post. Just the other day I was the thinking the same thing..."Am I doing a good job....if this was my real job would they even be willing to pay me for what I have been doing?" Thanks for the reminder of what is important and for the great ideas. I am going to go throw something away right now!

txmommy said...

awesome post!!
I think this is 100% right, now the hard part, implementing it. (for me not you:) )

Good luck with your new goals.

Sketchy said...

What a joyful and inspiring post! You know I'm a firm believer in taking stock in where you are and making positive changes. It sounds like you are doing some good things in your life right now. Go Stephanie!!!

Adventures In Babywearing said...

This was a wonderful post! Gina told me about this post and thought I would like it (I posted something similar yesterday) and I totally love it!! I must say your goals are admirable and something I aspire to as well!

Gina said...

I didn't leave a comment the other night when you posted it, because as soon as I was done reading, I went and wrote a love note to my hubby. He found it on his car window in the morning. I also left him a sexy note with soap on the bathroom mirror. He called me later in the day to thank me. It was awesome. Thanks for the inspiration you are. You continue to be a shining example to me.

Dawn said...

Thank you for stopping by today and visiting me and reading about my journey with Kev. Did you get a chance to read his? It is amazing what I didn't know. But the good news is there's good news. Stay tuned!! Check his out and leave him a bit of encouragement, if you have time.

I just looked at your hair blog - have you read Kev's wife's story about her braiding side business? It's right below his second edition of his story. She's amazing. I love the short bob on little girls as well - I always kept Kristen's that way and now Care Bear's is that way, but only because she cut off one side of her hair and we had to get it evened up. Yay!!

emlouisa said...

I LOVE this post. I have been thinking about this a lot lately too and I've really been trying to be better.

Wondeful!

Jennifer B. said...

Just discovered your blog--so glad you came out of lurking on Cjane's! Your post is inspiring. Food for thought--thank you.

CHEL said...

Awesome! I needed that!

Suzanne said...

Wow! Great post! I think you pretty much summed up how things are with me. I'm working on a lot of the same things. Thanks for reminding me what's important! :)

Kelli in the Mirror said...

I'm going to link to this post. It's awesome.

Gabriela said...

Great post Stephanie! I struggle with a lot of the same things you do. Thanks so much for your honesty, and good luck with your desired changes to your life! You can do it!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

A lot of the things you mentioned hearkened unto wisdom dispensed by Dr. Laura. Whenever I listen to her I mentally evaluate the things I'm coming up short in. I need to start writing that list down on paper because my memory isn't functional enough to cram so many mental reminders of failures into it.

Thought provoking post. Your older daughter looks a lot like my 7 year old, Natalie. The hair, skin, and eyes are identical in color.

Cmommy said...

Busted. I. Am. Busted! We've been overhauling the unfinished part of our basement, to build a batting cage, and I am shocked and ashamed at the baggage I've been stockpiling and dragging around...we are trying to throw things away, simplify.

I, too, want our summer to be very family-centered. How can we be more organized aboout that---do you have a chart/plan/etc? Share!! :-)C

smart mama said...

i am due for annual review

utmommy said...

I'm sure you are a lot harder on yourself than you should be. Our jobs as mothers, wives, housekeepers, is not an easy one. I've been thinking about these things a lot lately too. It can be so overwhelming. But, I feel that if we are doing the best we can then things will work out!

Ashley said...

that was so sweet!

The Lazy Organizer said...

I'm sure you are doing a great job but we all have room for improvement don't we? You should come do Smart Habit Saturday with me on my blog. You could inspire all of us!

14 days of Valentines sounds fun. I wish I had thought of doing something like that!

Keep up the good work!