9.19.2006

"I'm so beautiful."

Last year I went shopping with my mom and M. We were shoe shopping and we walked past a full-length mirror. M flipped her hair and said without any conceit or vanity “I’m so beautiful.” It was so matter of fact, like the sky is blue or the grass is green. I was kind of taken aback by it and I said to my mom “When do we stop thinking that about ourselves?” to which she wisely answered, “When we start listening to other people.”

After I do little T’s hair she always says “I’n so pitty!” to which I tell her, yes you are on the inside and the outside. There is a point to this, I promise.

Today I went shopping, a rather trying experience. I was rather dismayed to find that I had grown a pant size and it made me boil inside. I grumbled, and then I pulled out the larger pair and put them on to which my two-year old said “Mom, you so pitty!” I stopped my grumbling immediately. What was I teaching my child? I started thinking about that. In the eyes of my children I am beautiful. In the eyes of my Father in Heaven, I am beautiful. So society has these standards of what “beautiful” is. It is a standard that most of us “average” women will never achieve.

I have a tendency to look in the mirror and see flab, bread-dough, a muffin-top, whatever. How does my Heavenly Father feel when I do that? I am sure he isn’t proud of me. So today when I came home and I tried on my pants again, I looked at my soft belly and realized that it will never regain its former taut glory because two amazing children were grown there and I wouldn’t change that for the prettiest abs in town. I looked at my pale skin and instead of thinking about how tan it used to be, I looked at it and thought about how my time is better spent playing with my kids than indulging in my own vanity.

I want my girls to grow up knowing that no matter what shape they are, no matter what their skin looks like, no matter what kind of clothes they wear, no matter what color their hair is, that they are amazing and beautiful. I have to start by stop beating my self up. Heavenly Father made me this way and he would be so disappointed to hear me ripping on this body he gave me to house my spirit.

So today I want to hear about you. What is it that makes you beautiful on the inside and the outside? Today I want you to stop listening to what other people have to say and I want you to tell me in the most matter-of-fact way you can, what makes you beautiful…inside and out.

11 comments:

utmommy said...

What a great outlook. I seem to be down on myself a lot, and I'm pretty sure it's not the best example to be setting for my children, especially my girls, who have already asked me if they were fat. They are 7 and 4, of course they aren't fat.

What makes me beautiful? I don't know. I guess I really like my eyes, that's the outside part. As for the inside, I think I get along pretty well with most people. I have a lot of friends, which makes me feel good. Thanks for making me stop and think! I think we as women need to do that more.

By the way, I'm clueless on what to write to Play-doh about. Any suggestions? I'd love freebies :)

Tori :) said...

Wait a minute. You went shopping WITH YOUR KIDS and actually got to TRY ON clothes??? How'd you manage that? Your girls must be a lot more chilled out than my 3 year old.;)
I have been feeling so crappy about my body and your post really made me think. Thank you.
What makes me beautiful?? I like my eyes and my smile. I like anything on my above my neck. ;) As for my inner beauty... I'm witty. I think people usually like me- once they get to know me which is kinda hard to do unless you read my blog. ;)
I think we'd get along great Stephanie. I would love to meet you one day. :)

No Cool Story said...

:'-) That was beautiful.
The HG really spoke to you today didn't He? wow! what an amazing thing to understand in your heart.
Your kids are so blessed with you.

What makes me beautiful? Never thought about it. on the outside I'd say my brownness. As for inner beauty, that I'm compassionate.

Dawnyel said...

I normally don't think of myself as unattractive...until I pass a mirror. And I'm sure that problem came about when I started listening to what others said about me. I ALWAYS thought I was the prettiest person alive! Then some mean kid along the way messed me up!
I have a laugh that I'm told makes others feel warm and invited. I love making others feel like part of the group! (Those are my beautimous inside traits!)
As for the outside, I'm told constantly (by my dh!) that I'm beautiful, and cute...so I'm going to have to say that I'm glad I'm cute in his eyes! :)

smartmama said...

so true- having smart baby after 7 m/cs taught me alot about appreciating my body and what is true purpose and beauty

what makes me beautiful- I refuse to take life lying down.

abc momma said...

I was just telling dh last night that after I get my LASIK, I'll have to get a nose job. He said, "Did you say boob job?" We were just joking, but not really. It's easy to poke at my body to say I want this a bit smaller, and this a bit bigger, and I want this to disappear.

Great post! I think the best thing about me on the outside is my hair (on a good day) or my smile. On the inside, I think I'm friendly.

Kara Elmore said...

What a fantastic post. Thank you for making me stop and think. And think and think...

What makes me beautiful? Although I don't feel it now - but for the inside I try and make people feel good about themselves. I want them to be happy about themselves and who they are.

EmLouisa said...

I love love love this post. Thank you!!!!

What makes me beautiful...hmmm. On the outside I like my hair. Especially since cutting it short, because it's a little more spunky and I feel like it fits who I am on the inside more. On the inside I like my ability to make conversation. In all honesty, sometimes I am embarrassed that I talk so much, but I know that it is part of who I am, part of what makes me, so I like it.

Nettie said...

What a great post! I love the insight of your mother when she said we stop thinking we are beautiful when we start listening to others. My oldest daughter went through a phase of thinking she was fat last year. Hello! I think I have finally convinced her that there is absolutely nothing wrong about her body, only good! But, I'm sure she will have issues about this again. They (we) all do.

What makes me beautiful? Outside, my eyes cause they are so fashion conscious (they change color to match what I am wearing.) On the inside, my inclination to think the best of others. (Although this has niavely led me into trouble!)

Heidi said...

Thank you for sharing this insight! I have been struggling lately with my body since I have gained about 20 pounds in 3 months - ugh. This weekend I went on a retreat weekend with a bunch of women from my church and the focus was on us being focused on God and reflecting him in our daily life.

It feels good to be focused on that again in all aspects of my life and I feel ok with this body I live in and I know that it is my spirit that needs most be beautiful.

I guess what makes me beautiful is that I try to find the good in everyone.

Brianne said...

Thank you so much for the reminder! It's so hard to get past the world's idea of what beautiful is and remember that although man looks at the outside, God looks at the heart.
I'm in my 5th month of pregnancy, and although I LOVE the experience and am so excited about my ever-exapnding belly, sometimes it's hard to get past the thought that my body isn't what it was and probably won't ever be again.
But like you so wonderfully said, I wouldn't trade my baby for anything!
I pray that you're able to teach your children that they are always beautiful as God's precious creations, and not to succumb to the world's standard!